We finally made it back to the PNW!
Hello everyone!
I know it's been a loooooooong time since I last posted on my blog. There's been a lot happening with us including a move back to the west coast. We arrived out in Washington just a few weeks ago and are getting settled in to our new place. We're so thankful for all of the people who supported us and helped facilitate the various pieces of this move. The friends who helped Tim get his wings back. The friends who connected us with their landlord so we didn't have to hunt for a house. Another set of friends who helped facilitate the sale of our home in Texas. Tim's brother who drove one of our cars across the country so I could attend my grandpa's 100th birthday party. Our family members took me to the airport in Great Falls and friends who picked me up at the airport in Salt Lake. The friends and family we stayed with in New Mexico, Utah, Montana, and Oregon. The friends took care of our mail, the cat, and our sanity. People who fed us food and fed our hearts. This has been one big demonstration of the love of friends and a supportive community. We are so thankful for all of you.
After our cross-country trek we hit the ground running out here. Tim is already back at work doing what he loves best. We've been catching up with long-time friends and visiting beautiful places. It's more beautiful out here than I remember - is that even possible!? All of the fun we've been having has meant that we're a little behind with unpacking the house. We need to take advantage of the sun and warm weather while it's here! We have had a few rainy days and I have loved them so much - I broke out the sweatshirt (a Pacific NW Bikini as my neighbor calls it), the hot tea, and a good book. To be honest, I can't wait for more rainy days! It was LOVELY!
On July 22nd I marked a year since my last chemo treatment, it's good to be a year out! I am still figuring out what my boundaries are in terms of activity and energy. Recently I had a crash - headache, fatigue, irritability, and body aches. It felt like I was recovering from a chemotherapy session. We've been on the go since mid June, so I feel that the crash I had was a culmination of all of the travel, interaction, and activity. My chemo brain is getting a lot better - I still have forgetful moments, but they feel like normal forgetful moments not the "time travel" I have experienced where I forget entire conversations and events. It's a nice change and I feel like I am able to participate actively in the world around me again. I have been told that it can take up to 2 years for your body to fully recover from chemotherapy and I know I still have a ways to go. But it's so good to be a year out.
Some people have asked me if I am "cured" or "in remission" now and I don't really have a clear answer to that question. I had a PET scan before we left Texas because there's some lingering side effects from chemo that my doctors are monitoring. In that scan there was "no evidence of disease" - meaning that at that moment, in that scan, doctors could see no signs of cancer. I feel like that's a win and is the best that it will get. I take solace in the idea that at last check, there was no evidence of disease. It might feel to you that this is a downer to say this - after all so many people celebrate "beating cancer" or being "cured". But for me this seems like more of an on going journey. I have been living scan to scan since I was 18 and will have scans for the rest of my life. I will take anti-cancer meds for 10-15 years, and will always need to be mindful that my body is pre-disposed to cancer. That doesn't mean that there isn't life left to be lived or fun to be had! It just means that being "no evidence of disease" more accurately describes my situation.
This is going to be my last post for a while - I am in a stable state medically and am excited to get to back to living life! But please keep in touch - text, email and letters are best. But I do check social media occasionally and I will get back to you, it will just take a little while!
If you're in our neck of the woods please holler - we'd love to see you and have a guest room waiting for you. TK would love to meet you and is waiting expectantly for you at the door.
Sending love and hugs your way!
- Nicole
